Lesbian Love Letters
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Below are the 10 most recent journal entries recorded in the "lesbian love letters" journal:
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still mystery motionless life waiting impatiently while nature wild opposite vitality contrast benchmark compass gauge orienting spark stimulus trigger crack of a small whip not to hurt or injure but to awaken
again the wonder|
veiling couldn't tell you what I'm feeling therefore use of veil to hide what cannot be hidden that which burns through any shield no way to suppress on some level you feel what I transmit to you without really wanting to let it be detected because on a deeper level than that I do want you to know and feel despite any and all contradictions/confusions/fragmentations/fears to the contrary dear me dear you may the ultimate source lead us through all of this! again the wonder where are they where are you where am I? please turn back on the magnets
the air is so thin so non-existent in these precincts that there is barely a living soul any longer in or around here a no-woman's zone it would appear
Current Mood: feeling of icy distance
thoughts for you|
I think of you often, can't seem to dismiss these feeling of yearning. It's been so long since I've seen you or heard from you, yet I can still feel you under me, over me, near me. I feel that look in your eyes, that wonderous, amazing look that made me fall in love with you. I remember rolling in the snow during the holidays, do you remember? When we pulled over to a park on a whim and chased and played in the newly-fallen snow, making snow angels, or when we played hooky one day and drove up in the mountains. Me, you and the pup bounding in the snow. I miss you incredibly. Your serious, intelligent side, your humorous, flighty side, and your sad, scared side. I see you from time to time and know that I can never tell you these things. It's not fair to you, and it's not fair to me, so I smile and keep things lighthearted and simple. I hate being surface with you, but know it's for the best. I wonder if you know how much you mean to me, how you're never far from my heart. You feel like the first time I was in love, intense, enduring, and unattainable. Just to hold you close once more...forever just out of reach. I hope you find your other half, that appreciates you half as much as I do, and hopefully, they will never let you slip away into yesterdays and what might have beens.
Current Mood: contemplative
Current Music: Buckets of Rain - Bob Dylan
I stopped loving you when I stopped hearing your voice inside my head. I can begin to remember its deep rich tinges, but that is just my brain trying to recreate you. It makes me laugh to think how many of the things I liked about you all amounted to pure narcissism on your part: you think you are the most beautiful creature ever created. You make other people want to touch your skin, to be inches away from you. I stopped loving you because you could never see me the same way you see yourself.
From a distant cloud, ever yours, Lisa
slightly off topic|
[Dear Moderator, please feel free to delete if this post is inappropriate for this community. Thanks!]
This is slightly off topic, but I wanted to let the queer girls here know that I have created a new community called queergirlsbooks — "Books By, For and About Queer Girls" for recommending and discussing our favorite authors.
I thought about you today. I try not to do this often, but I was watching Animal Planet. They were filming a pride of lions, their long limbs stretched out in such a leisurely manner, tongues casually licking each other, the initimacy nothing to be ashamed of.
I thought about you, and the nights we spent together. You had just broken up with B. and I... I had been waiting. Always waiting. I'll always wait for you.
It used to be the other way around. I was involved with L. and I thought it was love, but something changed. Over time, you changed me. My eyes strayed, then stayed on you. I wanted to make love to you forever, taste you on my lips, dip my tongue into you and taste your sweetness as I would a delicate peach. And I loved that. I loved tasting you, feeling you clench around me, the feel of your warmth as I wrapped myself around you.
Too late, I realized it. Selfishly, I pulled back, and I'm writing because I miss you. Not just the sex, nor even the love, but the friendship we had built. The one I had come to count on in my time of need. The one I fell in love with.
Is that all there is?
You have new lovers, serial relationships, your eyes turned away, now far away from me, but I can't stop longing for you, for your love. My beautiful Leo lover, the one who tasted of peaches and vanilla. The one I can't stop longing for in my head, and my body can't let go.
I'm sorry I hurt you, love. Come back to me and let me love you once more, this time, I'll be honest and I'll be right.
Current Mood: lonely
Current Music: Aucifer - Datenshi Blue
Kissing Aphrodite--Ami M. Doehring|
( you kneel in front of me taking the hem of my gown--letting your fingers travel--watching me unravel & slowly release my body from the confinement of satin. you raise the gown over my head & we press our skin together--naked for the first time.Collapse )
forcing my emotions
to go deeper than your body's
surface, I’m longer drawn by the color
of your eyes but I search your pupils for purpose
. . .no longer expecting you to be perfect
your "seem to be" flaws
shape the smile between my
nose and chin, wearing my patience thin,
so i grasp what i hold within and think under the
thick blankets of my mind's desire not wanting to reveal myself until
If I could somehow get you to speak all of the words you ever knew I would make them tangible or better yet. . .pliable. Is that the word you use? I would make your words into a big, soft blanket that I could wrap myself in when I am feeling alone, sad or when I want to feel something beautiful. I want to make your eyes into eye glasses so that I can see how you see certain situations. I want to know you because your words are so wonderful. Not wanting to know you would be like not wanting to feel the warmth of the sun during summertime. If your words replaced your skin I would fall in love with you immediately. You could be a murderer, an atheist, anything, and it would mean nothing to me because I'd be blinded by the beauty in your words. I read them aloud, I read them slowly, I read them so they kiss my lips on the way out of mouth, I read them when I am in bed, I read them with a smile on my face, I read them as if I knew they would dissapear tomorrow, I read them with longing, I read them always wanting more.
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